Part I: Why This is a Bad Idea | A Bad Guide To HTML1

Part I: Why This is a Bad Idea

In The Beginning...

Self harm comes in many forms; some people cut parts of their body, others drink or take drugs, while many other forms of self harm are not so obvious; you may be thinking to yourself; "Why is this guide on HTML1 talking about self harm out of all things?" Well perhaps reading a guide on HTML1 in itself is a form of self harm, you may laugh now; but one minute you're learning HTML, the next you're installing Linux... *shivers*

If you want to start to find out about HTML1, it is best to install a text editor; there are many good ones out there, but let's be real here when we say that Notepad++ is for the pros, why? Because it has a dark theme to it, so you look like a l33t ha0r. If you're thinking to yourself that you will just stick to the default one that comes with Windows, just don't, it's really not all that good for things for writing code/HTML, for example, you can only undo an error (CTRL+Z) once before it stops you dead in your tracks, it also doesn't have the option to have mutable tabs open at once, finally, the set-up for it is very easy and it is updated fairly regally.

Before you fully start, it is recommended that you start to drink copious amounts of whatever alcohol you can find, if you're under the drinking age in wherever you are, you can find the good stuff on the top shelf of your dad's cabinet. This is known as the "Ballmer Peak", where you get so pissed out of your mind drunk that you *somehow* have the ability to program while intoxicated.

Why Learn HTML1?


What is HTTP?

Unless you're viewing this in the year 2142 where the Web is shot directly into your eyeballs (you look foolish, by the way) then you are most likely viewing this text in a web browser of some sort, and if you look up, you can see the URL of this webpage (unless you're using a browser that just shows the domain name, then root, in that case, just click on the URL bar, then you should see the full URL). A Uniform Resource Locator or URL (no-one in their right mind would ever call a URL by its longer name) is kind of like a book page number in your auntie's erotic books that you found in error while you were younger... Anyway, a URL will look something like this;, the part we really care about here is the http part. When it comes down to it, there are two types of this protocol:-

Type one is HTTP (Hypertext Transfer Protocol), the long and short is that this is used to send and receive webpages and files on the internet.

Type two is HTTPS, now, unlike just plane ol' HTTP, this one is cooler, as the S stands for "Secure", so it now fully stands for "Hypertext Transfer Protocol Secure". Along with doing everything else that HTTP did, HTTPS now encrypts all the information that is sent and received. This can stop malicious users such as hac0rz from stealing the information, and HTTPS is quite often used on many payment websites.

Okay, so why is this being brought up? So a little history for full context here, in 1994 Netscape Communications (who were really like the Google of the past), created HTTPS for its web browser, Netscape Navigator. So because HTTPS was made in '94, then that means that WorldWideWeb will *not* support it, and will probably make the browser have a fatal error (or not, I don't know), so if you want to be able to make a website that can run on WorldWideWeb, then you should try and look for a webhost that allows the option for just HTTP (or you can locally host the "web"-site on your computer so that you're the only one who can view it, but that kind of ruins the fun, as no-one else can see it).

So, because your site needs to be able to run on HTTP, a non-secure protocol, it can be harder and harder to find a webhost that allows the option of just HTTP (funny that most people who want a host look for HTTPS), so you might need to look around a bit. But using a service like InfinityFree *might* work fine (*this* website is hosted on one of their sites), as they do not provide you with the HTTPS unless you find yourself certificated on Cloudflare. But of cause, InfinityFree *isn't* the only webhost, so try looking around before you fully decide.

To Recap

You will only really need a few things/know a few thing to really get into HTML1;
  • -A good text editor (we say to use Notepad++, but there are *many* free ones out there, if you can, do a simple search of reviews on the Web, there are also a lot of good resources on places like YouTube).
    -Try and get rather drunk.
    -Be aware of HTTP/HTTPS; look for a webhost that allows HTTP
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    Copyright 2019, Clive "James" Python,
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