In Your Name You Have My Charity Project

So, because I put my E-Mail address out on the Web for all to see, I get some spam E-Mails now and then, most of them are people pretending to be companies I don't use saying that I need to collect a parcel I didn't order. But every now and then I find a gem like this E-Mail claiming to be a Spanish business tycoon who has found my E-Mail and has decided that they want to scam me.

Subject: In Your Name You Have My Charity Project
From: Zara Foundation <ama[...]on@fo[...]>
To: Clive Python <>

I, Amancio Ortega Gaona a Spanish fashion businessman and founding chairman of the Inditex fashion group, best known for its chain of Zara clothing and accessories retail shops. you can read about me on:

I intend to give to you a portion of my Net-worth which I have been banking. I want to cede it out to you hoping it would be of help to you and others too.

Respond for confirmation.
With love,
Amancio Ortega Gaona

God, it would be really weird if the letter sent was the real deal and it really was from Amancio Ortega Gaona, who had found my website and decided that a guy who fetishised Rotten Dot Com, who wrote shitty My Little Pony stories and made a shitty webcomic deserved some of his money. How kind.

Since we're here, I might as well show you some other spam I get~

Subject: Report-ID: 21/04/2017
From: Parking Service <weualj581[...]20783@fari[...]>
To: Clive Python <>

Dear Driver,
This is the automatic informational message of the Parking Service.

Road cameras have recorded the limit exceeding of your automobile. Due to that, you will have to pay the corresponding fine.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---

To successfully complete the payment, you will have to document the invoice on the official website.

Your Fine Invoice ID is [Removed]

Please submit it here: [A link that is not recognised by any government body]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---

Then, you will receive all required details to execute the payment.
You have one day to finalize the fine. Alternatively, significant charges may apply.
Please do not reply to this message.


Kindest Regards,
Parking Service

It's always nice to see people thinking that I'm an American and a bad driver - well, that last part is true, but not the first - it's also nice to see that the Parking Service is checking up on people exceeding the speed limit.

Anyway, this last E-Mail is my personal favourite, I'll let it speak for itself;

Subject: Hello
From: barrfrank kufu <revp[...]>
To: Clive Python <>

Dear ,

I am Barrister Frank Kufu ,i am contacting you in regards to my late client unclaimed fund ($ 5.7 million)

Please i need your help.

Reply for more details through my private e-mail: ( barrf[...]fu@ya[...] )


Barrister frank kufu

I mean, really?

Written by Clive "James" Python, 2017-10-31.